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I AM LOOKING FOR A MAN Blog by Clare Fisher Psychotherapist




Okay so this blog is slightly misleading, I am not looking for a man, but it made you look!


My blog is inspired by a TikTok Influencer called ‘Girl on  Couch’ who decided to write a little ditty in the hope that more musical creators could add their magic to make it a viral song for summer.



The song lyrics are simple yet catchy

“I am looking for a man in finance, trust fund, 6’ 5, blue eyes.”…………………..



The song has now gone viral and has so many wonderfully catchy versions.


What has this got to do with a mental health blog? well indulge me and I will explain. I work with clients who are reconsidering their less-than-romantic relationship or are trying to reinvigorate a stale one and others who are trying to find a fresh match. My initial suggestion is for my clients to explore their core values, those personal truths that when actualized help them to navigate and make sense of their often complex and challenging world. Core values are our ethics/morals, they are what we stand for, they give us purpose, a decision-making framework, strength, stability and a conscience.

 

So why do I suggest that my clients who are struggling with their relationships to focus on their core values? well it is simple if you hold patience as a virtue and your partner or prospective partner is impatient then that could be a deal breaker. If you hold value in wealth creation and your partner is happy with a few pounds in their bank account your long term  compatibility may be questionable. 


Girl on Couch’s song about looking for a man who is tall in stature, professional, career-minded, rich and with blue eyes; may be viewed by some as a parody full of red flags,  but others may view it as an aesthetically pleasing aspiration for a perfect pairing. 


Core values may be at the heart of a healthy, happy, compatible and sustainable relationship.


It’s worth considering!


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